I found out I was pregnant 11 days after my son's 2nd birthday. My birth control had either failed at its job, or I failed to be responsible.
I had always been pro-life throughout my first pregnancy, and maintained very conservative values in everything I did. Not once did abortion ever come into my mind until I began picturing myself living off the government's money for some time, asking my family for help constantly, fighting with my boyfriend, and just generally struggling for the rest of my life...financially and emotionally.
Would I want this child to grow up in a home that was unstable from the start? I grew up with many friends living in less than desirable homes, and it would break my heart to know that I have to raise my two children in the same capacity.
I made an appointment at a clinic 2 hours away. The first appointment was relatively short - the nurse inquired about our reason for an abortion, did a few blood tests, an ultrasound, and told us what to expect depending on which type of abortion we chose. I made my procedure appointment for later that week. In the state I am in, you have a mandatory waiting period between the time you visit the clinic first off and the procedure.
On the day of the procedure, I was nervous, sad, and concerned if this was the choice I was really going to make. I also felt that it had to be done - I would never raise another child in a situation where I cannot provide for him/her.
After it was done, I felt that it was definitely the right decision. I am glad I had access to proper care, good information, and a choice to make the life for my 2 year old better rather than harder for him and another baby.
I don't want to hide behind my abortion. I don't feel shameful for having it, and I wish that more women could have the ability to choose this option if they wanted it - not only for themselves and their family, but for the child, too.