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This story is about my daughter and the most horrible experience of her life.

When she was about 16 weeks pregnant, the placenta seemed to be snagged on the scar from a prior C-section. Although the doctor hoped it would correct itself, during the next few weeks, the placenta started growing towards the bladder. By week 20 things were really bad.

The doctors told my daughter that she would never carry the pregnancy to an age of fetal viability. The real danger was that the placenta would rupture and my daughter would bleed out, and die. Apparently the blood flow through the placenta is about 1 unit of blood per minute. So you bleed out in a matter of minutes. Even if my daughter stayed in the hospital when she started to bleed, there was still a 10% chance that she would die from blood loss before they could stop the bleeding. The recommendation from the doctors was to end the pregnancy before her bladder was compromised, understanding that there was no possibility of a happy ending for her condition.

My daughter needed to save her own life to care for her other two children so she made the most horrible decision of her life-she decided to abort a perfectly fine fetus. I truly believe that the most basic instinct of a parent is to protect their child, at whatever cost. In this case, my daughter had to do the exact opposite, she had to terminate the life of her child. I cannot think of a more horrible decision.

Although this happened several years ago, my daughter still gets depressed every year on the anniversary of her daughter’s death, and I still send her a bouquet of white flowers in memory of the daughter who died to save her mother’s life.

Everyone should be able to decide if, when, how, and with whom they start or grow a family.

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